When Reality Strikes

I have heard from a lot of you wondering if I was in official hiding.  I am not.  I am here. Struggling with the real journey that is life and just needed some time to regroup.

fear

I have been offline for about week now.  Our mini vacation was great, had a bit of a stomach bug over the weekend and then off up North with my eldest for a couple of days.  I managed to get in a few days of intervals, but overall, my scheduled workouts and plan for clean eating was almost on hold. And there’s a reason for all of this…

As some of you know, I have made major shifts in my life including leaving my career 18 months ago and just recently parting ways with the job I had with my trainer.  The decision to take the month of August to spend with the kids and focus on “WHAT’S NEXT” was a big one.  August is now almost done – so, what do I do now?

Have you every felt lost? Like overwhelmed and really not knowing what direction to move towards? Well, I had a great interview last week and was certain it would pan out.  Perfect schedule so I could still build my personal training client base, work from home, ability to take my kids to school – all working out with when I needed and planned to start working again.  And then, word of a restructure at the company came to me; the position I was in for was cut.  No offer.  I was crushed.

I am now searching and wondering and with that, I over think.  And when I over think, I get overwhelmed and when that happens, I quickly shut down.  When the old me would have turned to food, I am much more aware of my behaviours and triggers and trying to fight the daily battle to remind myself why I have fought every day to stay on track.  With the added stress, lack of high intensity activity I have been accustom to and my increase in carbs, sugar and white flour, I can honestly feel my mid section expanding.  And it is something I hate!

A good friend of mine told me last night that people want to hear the truth. That there are moments of absolute desolation and there needs to be a reality in my journey; that not every day is perfect, because I’m not.  That there are days I feel like shit and just want to continue hiding on the couch with my popcorn.  Well, I’m here to confess the last seven days have sucked, but finding my voice and focus again is what picking myself up is all about.  And it there is one thing I will NOT do, is get back to this!

odlmeI have also joined a 90 Day Challenge with my good friend Lillian.  Lillian has put together 20 women who will be focussed on their health and wellness through sponsorship with GoodLife Clubs and Inspire Fitness.  I will have free access to a gym and Zumba which I am so super excited about.  Sometimes the journey gets lonely and we all need to face our fears and move through them.

I have never actively participated in a group challenge as I have always been a little weary.  I am excited and looking forward to the next 90 days!

Thanks to all who have continued to stick by me, sent me private messages about their own journeys and have given me reasons beyond my wildest dreams to keep moving forward!

Have an awesome Thursday!  I know I will!

Axo

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3 thoughts on “When Reality Strikes

  1. ade says:

    Hi sweetheart, I just read this. Now I know what happened to the job opp. I know you will definitely get through this. I love you and am praying for you. You certainly are at a crossroads. But I also know that you are strong and I am inspired by you all the time.
    Love ade

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