Being Fat is Not Fun – A response to I’mperfect Life’s My Weight (and size) Matters

I have been blessed with meeting some pretty amazing people over the course of the last five years.  Some have come and gone, some remain at the sidelines and others have been woven into the tapestry of my life in a way that may not need daily interaction, but they feel like home and can be visited when we need to feel that connection.

This group is not many, but few sacred souls that have a common platform in life and that is to show vulnerability and truth in their journey; and in that, they push themselves forward because, really, as Valerie June said, “I live a life of forward motion” and that’s where we should always be headed.

Recently, one of these kindred spirit, Andrea, wrote a blog post that made sense.  Now, I love reading blogs.  I love them because writers tend to bare all.  They offer us perspective on things that we may not have otherwise considered.  I write as therapy.  And I know other bloggers do the same.

Andrea tapped into her BRAVE (which even us type As need to do sometimes) and wrote a piece that needed to be written.  Entitled “My Weight (and size) Matters“, it lends comment on a little of the body positive movement that has been sweeping through the universe over the last while.  As we know, social media makes this world small; #bopo has always existed, but we may be more aware because of the means and speed at which we receive its messages.

I believe I have been and am part of this body positive movement. And please pause for a brief footnote: I am, not because I bare all, or I get pictures taken in my undies, or that I allow my jiggle to show in my workout videos.  I am a part of this movement because I am have shared my story during my body transformation with honesty and grit; because, at every stage (even those stages that have a VERY long stretch of non-activity or focus), I am working towards bettering my health and the result of these efforts are shown through a transforming body.

To me, that’s what the body positive movement should be about.  It should be about accepting and loving your body as it “outwardly” appears, but equally accepting and loving your body in a way that expresses your desire to care for it  – move it, nourish it and honour it.

I could never really comment on what life was like without limitations… Adina on the Left was achy, depressed, and used food as comfort.  She worried about fitting in seats at the amusement park, if the plus size clothes she bought last year would still fit, what it felt like to see her toes.  But after three years of grueling work, when I finally realized this body of mine was it until I died, that mint green pinup dress life was great.  It was mine to experience.

I supported and personified body positive because I was doing the work.  I loved my body, with its dimples, and stretch marks and rolls, and was publicly paying it the greatest honour I could – I was taking care of it.  I now knew life in the middle.  And still at 200 lbs, I was my healthiest I had ever been, my most active I had ever been and I was doing okay.

Adina Now (Right) has had a set-back.  An injury that left me crippled emotionally which eventually lead to an overwhleming feeling of shame for allowing my body to creep back to its sedentary self.

Andrea is right:

“My weight (and size) matters because it directly affects how I feel: physically, mentally, and emotionally.’ Andrea Matthes

 This is wholeheartedly the truth!  I can’t do what I was able to do two years ago (physical).  I struggle daily with balancing my schedule and wanting to please everyone around me (mental).  I battle my demons that include shame, embarrassment and guilt (emotional).  These are all directly affected by my size and my relationship with my body.
For me, being Fat is Not Fun.
Sometimes, someone else can just say it better:
Although neither body-weight, nor size, should be the deciding factor when it comes to our health and happiness, they are undeniably a factor when it comes to our quality of life.
  • I want to run again.
  • I want to have eight hours of crazy, sweaty sex and not feel winded.
  • I want to walk up that hill in Halifax while singing and skipping.
  • I want my kids to grow up in a family where health is the foundation (and to be around a mom that want to do things with them).
  • I want my quality of life to reflect the body positive activist I am!

So, I am investing in me, again.  I am sharing my journey, again.  I am reminding myself that this body needs to work hard for the best possible quality of life, again.  And I am aiming for a life without limitations, again.

Thank you Andrea for saying what a lot of us have been thinking.

I am a proud body positive woman – that pride needs to be evident in EVERYTHING I do to protect and feed my soul, mind and physical self, every day of my life.

Fat is Not Fun.  I want Fun again.

~Axo

 

 

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2 thoughts on “Being Fat is Not Fun – A response to I’mperfect Life’s My Weight (and size) Matters

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